Don’t worry, this article will not talk about SMART goals.
It will talk about mutual financial goals that help married couples grow their intimacy together and with God. Those goals may be SMART, but it’s more important that they be together. Not my way, or your way, or even God’s way. We’re talking about the three together in one for a NEW way.
If you’re married, your most important relationship on earth is with your spouse, second only to your relationship with God. As you create mutual financial goals, make some that will promote your intimacy with God and each other. These most important relationship take intentional priorities. The top priority is to listen to the Lord together through prayer.
Prayer – communicating with God in His presence – was our original created purpose, before sin messed everything up. Our purpose was to cultivate God’s garden so that we could walk and talk and be with God directly. Adam and Eve didn't have to worry about finances back then.
So God created mankind in his own image, in the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish in the sea and the birds in the sky and over every living creature that moves on the ground.” Then God said, “I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food. And to all the beasts of the earth and all the birds in the sky and all the creatures that move along the ground—everything that has the breath of life in it—I give every green plant for food.” And it was so. God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. -Genesis 1:27-31a (NIV)
Ideas for Your Garden Together
What is your garden together as a married brother and sister in Christ? What do you need to do financially to cultivate your garden together? Literally, how are you going to steward your home so that it builds up your relationship as well as its value? Consider these ideas to get started:
Cultivate a garden and/or landscaping in your back yard and every week intentionally sit and enjoy it together
Take an annual vacation rest trip, just the two of you
Attend an annual marriage building retreat
Get a local museum or botanical garden membership and keep monthly dates
Take a quarterly day hike / overnight camp trip
Walk in the park / picnic / play sports monthly
Have a long weekend local hotel staycation with romantic fun
Soak in a hot tub / jacuzzi bath weekly
Set aside a special garden / room prayer altar space with incense or essential oils
Just hang out together monthly for a meal, coffee, game, or event
All of these things cost money, so plan, budget, save, and invest to pay for them ahead of time. The greatest financial investment you can make in your marriage is specific, intentional time to pray, listen, talk, relax, rest, and cultivate your relationship with God together – that is intimate relationship. In the end of time, we will be spending a lot of time in a garden together.
On each side of the river stood the tree of life, bearing twelve crops of fruit, yielding its fruit every month. And the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations. No longer will there be any curse. -Revelation 22:2-3a (NIV)
Financing Your Marriage Intimacy Garden
The garden for your marriage has price tags: money, time, and talent. But our marriage garden is a great example of applied stewardship. What are you both working for? Your most important relationships? A bigger house? More stuff? A better tithe?
Your marriage takes cultivation to survive and thrive. It will take intentional financing beyond the wish of staying out of debt. Fit your marriage intimacy building into your spending, saving, and investing plans – ANY financial situation can handle an intentional mutual intimacy building goal.
Start with your next monthly money date. Pray about your garden together. Plan something that builds your marriage intimacy for next month, and put it in your spending plan. Save for a long annual trip or shorter quarterly getaways (or both). Invest to provide for the annual trip from increase income. Don’t let money and finances be a barrier to your marriage growth, make them the means to bearing fruit for a lifetime.